Betrayal Is Not A Good Look

Betrayal is a lonely and hurting feeling. Especially when the betrayal is committed by a love one, lover, or friend. Confiding in someone takes courage, vulnerability, and often times emotional and physical nudity. You see, betrayal only happens when trust has been extended and trust is only extended when we feel this person is safe, or so they seem. Yet, we forget that not everyone who enters our lives falls into the category of "Trust Me I Have Your Back". Not everyone we meet is Loyal. Loyalty is a character trait that has to be developed. You either understand and practice loyalty or you constantly commit acts of disloyalty.  

Some would say that Loyalty depends on the situation that a person is put into. However, situations don't create the person, the person gives power OR gives up power to the situation. Loyalty is a trait that overtime will become the biggest snitch in a relationship you will find. When it rears it's unsightly head how do you handle it? Do you give the person a chance to redeem themselves or quietly exit the relationship with your heart in your hand and tears in your eyes? Just remember, seeds start covered in dirt but they must push through the dirt to reach their full potential. 

How are you at being a loyal and trust worthy spouse, friend, employee, or co-worker? Would people say that you are consistently showing loyalty and trust within your everyday relationships? Whatever we emit, that shall we receive. It is imperative that we understand the benefits that loyalty bring into our everyday existence. We are mirror images to a world where the "Crabs In A Barrel" mentality thrive and loyalty and honor which should be on display seem to be a dying characteristic. If you have a spouse, a friend, a family member, or you are displaying disloyal behavior check it now. Kindly but firmly put out into the atmosphere that Loyalty and Consistency in Relationship is a Must, and Without It, There's No Building Foundation, and No Real Trust. 

Marriage is 4 Life,

T n T, (Tony & Tarenia)

MM4Life.com

We Know It's Hard, but Here are 10 Ways to Bond Your Blended Family

Is your blended family, not blending?  Don’t worry; get them to bond instead of blend!!  Think about it, how many people have a close relationship without bonding on some level. It becomes difficult, if not impossible to want to have a relationship with someone you have no common interest with. Your friends are people who make you laugh, think, push you to greater heights, and just make you feel accepted. Kids want to be accepted and loved. Validate and show interest in your new family and watch God move fear, attitudes, disrespect, and walls of resentment. Open yourself up and watch others become transparent with you.  Try these bonding family activities:

1. Play a board game or video game together – Taboo or Wii are great games to show your fun side

2. If a sport is what captures the attention of the child, get involved, watch with them or train with them, you may just get in shape or find a new hobby

3. Cook together – It’s a great way to learn how to “Blend” different items to achieve a great outcome and kids love to eat meals they have prepared

4. Get the kids involved in saving money – ask who will clip coupons or watch for bargains, even allow a child (with your help of course) to set a budget and shop for weekly items so they feel a part of the family

5. Set up family talent night – invite their friends over and make it a fun event-

6.  Choose a weekly movie night – Have each kid pick a week where they get to choose the movie the family watches – eat pizza and popcorn and enjoy

7. Have the kids do a photo shoot where you are the photographer – allow them to do a dress up scene, or dress like one of their favorite stars and watch their personalities come alive- allow them to photograph you also and make a scrap book with the different looks to share with others.

8. Ride bikes together or take walks around the neighborhood

9. Do a dream board or book together (learn to encourage their dreams)– find magazines with interesting pictures, items, or places and cut them out and place them on the board or book

10. Dance together – find music from your era and show them the dances from your time, then allow them to put on their music and show you the latest dances that are trending now.

Over time bonding will give way to blending and before you know it, everyone will enjoy being together. It takes time and intentional effort on the adult’s part. Children may not seem receptive at first, but keep trying. Consistency is the key, don’t start it and then stop it. Once the bonding process has taken place the blending process becomes automatic. Your marriage is worth the extra effort to welcome everybody into the family and allow them to feel like they belong. Remember, your marriage and family are a blessing and gift from God. (Psalm 127:3)

Marriage is 4 Life,
T n T, (Tony & Tarenia)
MM4Life

                                                             

I Want Others To See How Much You Mean To Me

Simply telling someone you care may not be enough. There are times when you have to show it in other ways. Take for instance when guys send flowers to their girls workplace the impact is so much more far reaching than if he had them sent to the house. The whole day, everyone that enters her space at work will ask her about the flowers and think highly of who sent them.  Those flowers just announced to everyone around her that she is special and cared for in a deep and meaningful way. Yes, she may not be the flower type, but trust me, EVERY WOMAN want's others to know that she is loved and thought about.

Ladies, your man wants the same attention. No, don't send flowers to his work. Depending on where he's employed that's probably not a good look. But don't negate the fact that he wants others to know that he is "THE MAN". His ego needs to be stroked in front of others and often. Compliment him on his work ethics, his style of dress, how great he smells,  his sense of humor, or other things that would make him feel appreciated. Men love to know that they are wanted and needed. If he is a great father or father figure let him know and encourage that sense of pride and commitment in side of him. If he makes you feel safe and secure, remind him that you appreciate the security he provides in your relationship. Serve him in front of others, never talk negatively about him towards your family or friends. Hey everyone has flaws, none of us are perfect. But talking about each other's flaws in front of others shouts disrespect in the worst possible way. Work to build each other and forgive grievances that are bound to come up day to day. Words and acts of deeds help to keep the relationship balanced and at ease and shows your spouse that your love and admiration for them has no limit and sees no end. This Marriage is 4 Life, Enjoy it to the Fullest.


Marry Me 4 Life,
T n T, (Tony & Tarenia)
MM4Life

The No Limit Marriage

The No Limit Marriage

There are times in our relationships where we ponder if it is worth the time, pain, and effort to stay. There are those moments that test the will, and strength to continue without knowing for certain if the pay off will be worth the sacrifice. All relationships go through seasons of change and pain. Yes, even the happiest of couples endure stretches of not so happy circumstances.
Yet, what keeps those couples and others going despite the rough patches? How do they manage to get their happy back and become a testament to others that follow behind them?

Believing that your relationship has purpose beyond the moment of a catastrophe is vitally important to maintaining its value and holding on in times of despair. A great marriage serves more than just the two people in it. With God it's reach has no limit. It is our faith, our undying belief that we have more good deeds and moments ahead than what is trying to stop us from moving forward together. Our hope in God, our faith in self and one another, and our love of relationship sustains us. We look beyond the flaws, hurt, embarrassment, and let downs knowing that greater is yet to come because of our sacrifice. It is in those moments, that we understand our burdens weight may be heavy, but God's yoke will lighten the load. We keep pressing to the end knowing that those along the way benefit positively, or negatively from the choices we make today. The future of generations to come depend on what we choose to do with our present situations. Let no stone be unturned, no corner be not mended, for what may not seem good now is set to become great just as God intended.


Marriage is 4 Life,
T n T, (Tony & Tarenia)
MM4Life